Aching for a Command

My failures, at an instant, are signals of defeat.
Today, I’m tired of waving that white banner indicating a retreat.
because what’s retreat if you’re maintaining your very same position,
riding out the tidal waves, bearing no new acquisition?
My stagnant soul tires and screams, “Where is it I should go?”
While restless hands assist my sleepless eyes with the promise not to close.
Every gaze from your eyes reminds me of mistake,
reminds me of intermittent effort,
the trust I always seemed to break.
But I promise to fall slave to making these recurring  amends,
all the while losing sight as our love slowly descends.
I pray nightly for lacking lost cause, I hope only for ascension,
a passion powerful and true to hold us in suspension.
Give me something undeniable, words that speak truth
otherwise pull me from this frozen state;
!basta ya!, genug ist genug.