Fifteen Minutes to Close

I have fifteen minutes to blog about whatever. I'm going to rant, and I'm going to make lots of run-on sentences, and this will make no sense.

Josh Gingell, I saw you yesterday and nothing has been more refreshing than to see you smile after hearing you cry so hard. I love you, strangely enough, as a brother.  I pray for you every single second of my life, think about you to the point of no sleep.  I woke up a couple of nights ago in a right-side up fetal position with my head stuffed in a sopping wet pillow, sweating like nobody's business. I can't stop thinking about you. I think about the silly stuff, and think that if you can no longer be silly like you used to, that I don't think I want to be alive.  Everything up until this point seems so incredibly insignificant. All of the fights, all of those bad times that we let consume us.  That I let consume me. It's nothing. Your health and survival are everything.  You are and always will be a part of my family.  My brother, if I could hold you tight and absorb your cancer, I would if it meant alleviating you and seeing you be happy and healthy again.  I think a lot about you having a family, and you having a wife that you make very happy and me being a very good friend that comes over and takes your kids for ice cream and has "dinner parties" with you.  Over and over again, I think about how silly everything up until this point is! Life seems so short, and you seemed so everlasting.  You will be, Josh.  I would honestly defeat the entire Green Lantern Corps. to steal their rings and will you to be alive and healthy for as long as Godly possible. I have seven minutes, it isn't enough time. I'm going to keep going.

  I'm going to be here regardless of anything or anyone. If seeing you meant climbing over rocks in a moat infested with gators and tarantulas i'd do it.  If it meant taking several punches to the face on the way up to your mother's doorstep, i'd do it.  I will be here, and I will be praying. I love you to no end, my family.